Cupcakes are the tattooed brunette chick of the baked goods world.

If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.

Life is what you make of it, unless you have tourette's, in which case much becomes involuntary.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

Happiness is a carnival game. It's never as easy as it looks, but the dumb ones always seem to be walking around with a big stuffed animal.

It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.

Learn to think for yourself, unless of course you can identify someone else with better judgement, and a flashlight.

In order to grow you have to let go of all that you are and all that you know.

Each and every day begins with a choice, the first influencing the second, the third and so on . . .

The question remains... who takes care of you, Miss Vale?" "I might ask the same question of you, Lord Dryden.

Whatever is not conscious will be experienced as fate.

We are not telling Tudor history; we are creating ' Wolf Hall ' from novels, which are already a rereading of Tudor history.

[Instead] of inquiring why the Roman empire was destroyed, we should rather be surprised that it had subsisted so long.

Little evil would be done in the world if evil never could be done in the name of good.

If we accept all that is wrong about us - and despite it, believe that we are deserving of a happy life - then we will have thrown open an immense window that will allow love to enter.

My friend Winnie is a procrastinator. He didn't get his birth mark til he was eight years old.

Christianity is art and not money. Money is its curse.