Johnny English is someone who really means well it's just that he's not as good as he thinks he is, and I think that maybe that's the British male in a nutshell.

To Be Successful You Don't Need Beautiful Face And Heroic Body, What You Need is Skillful Mind And Ability To Perform

You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.

I'm not a naturally funny man. I find that I can only be funny, if I become someone else.

The older you get, the more you realise how happenstance... has helped to determine your path through life.

But I always feel that whatever I do, I could do better. I suppose it is perfectionism.

I want to express myself in a different way. I have a performing inclination.

I can be reasonably funny and light-hearted when I'm in the company of good friends, but I'm not a jokesmith. I tend to be quite serious.

Your services might be as useful as a barbershop on the steps of a guillotine.

Art is something that nobody laughs at and nobody makes any money out of is the attitude, which I would dispute.

The path of my life is strewn with cow pats from the devil's own satanic herd!

All I'm saying is that minerals are just a rudimentary form of consciousness whereas the other people are saying that consciousness is a complicated form of minerals.

Character actors aren't a brand in the same way that high-profile leading men are.

But for us, in Syria, we have principles. We'll do anything to prevent the region from another crazy war. It's not only Syria. Because it will start in Syria.

So often we only do what we think is expected of us, when we are capable of so much more.

Religious persecution may shield itself under the guise of a mistaken and over-zealous piety.

I dont watch TV. I dont use a computer, a fax or a cellphone.

I always try to think before I talk.

I've struggled a lot for what I have today.

Mistress, I have never asked anything of you in my servitude. But now, I beg you this: do not make me keep passing these adolescent sentiments back and forth all night.

Whatever it takes to break you.