It's not a very big one, but at least it's dead and it took an awful lot of killing!

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.

If I were reincarnated I would wish to be returned to Earth as a killer virus to lower human population levels.

During the Blitz, a lot of shops had their windows blown in and put up notices saying, 'More open than usual'. I now declare this place more open than usual.

Cannibalism is a radical but realistic solution to the problem of overpopulation.

How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to pass the test?

People think there's a rigid class system here, but dukes have been known to marry chorus girls. Some have even married Americans.

I would like to go to Russia very much — although the bastards murdered half my family.

You're just a silly little Whitehall twit: you don't trust me and I don't trust you.

The bastards murdered half my family.

In the event that I am reincarnated, I would like to return as a deadly virus, in order to contribute something to solve overpopulation.

To have more, you must genuinely thank more.

He has achieved success who has lived well laughed often and loved much who has gained the respect of intelligent men and the love of little children.

When your soul is resting, your emotions are okay, your mind is okay, and your will is at peace with God, not resisting what He's doing.

Religion works on some people but not on everyone, because it says, 'Stop thinking and accept what I tell you.' That's not valid for people who want to think and reflect.

If we're not on them, they go back to their old ways.

By reading this message you are denying its existence and implying consent.

By perseverance, study, and eternal desire, any man can become great.

There is nothing outside of us that is not at the same time in us, and as the external world has its colors the eye, too, has colors.

Somebody told me I should try writing. Actually, a lot of people tried to get me to try writing, long before I thought I was 'the writing type'.

Such shame is not even skin deep. And as to forgetting, surely, you know that is Woman's First and Greatest Art?