Immortality is a by-product of good work.

My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.

As long as the world is turning and spinning, we're gonna be dizzy and we're gonna make mistakes.

I've been accused of vulgarity. I say that's bullshit.

If you stand on a soapbox and trade rhetoric with a dictator you never win.

Hope for the Best. Expect the worst. Life is a play. We're unrehearsed.

Life literally abounds in comedy if you just look around you.

If presidents can't do it to their wives, they do it to their country.

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.

Humor is just another defense against the universe.

I don't know what to say so I'll just say what's in my heart...badoom, badoom, badoom.

Unused power slips imperceptibly into the hands of another.

I am what I am, I'm doing very well in my life, and I'm thankful to God for that.

IPL does not allow Pakistani players because they are dangerous.

I was talking to a friend about Santorum. He said, 'For all my years in the State Department, I know one thing. Terrorists, what they fear most is a guy in a sweater vest.'

He wants all or nothing. The thought of a person calling himself a 'Christian' without being a devoted follower of Christ is absurd.

Could we perfect human nature, we might also expect a perfect state of things.

After a long day at work, I want someone to come home, turn on my video and think, "Oh my god, how girls get ready? This is hilarious, I love this, I'm forgetting about all my problems."

If you're lazy, don't expect much in terms of success. You're owed nothing and success will not be given to you. It's earned.

Even when something does not go my way, I get up and fight, that is what keeps me going.