If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.

You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.

Honey! Bring down a copy of my will - and an eraser!

To you, I'm an atheist.To God, I'm the loyal opposition.

God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.

Education is the key to progress and success for human beings and for a nation.

Money is only the root of all evil when it gets in the wrong hand.

Guilt is a useless feeling. It's never enough to make you change direction--only enough to make you useless.

A mule has neither pride of ancestry nor hope of posterity.

For many young women, the dream of independence and a home of their own is a tantalising goal, while a lifetime devoted solely to catering for another person's needs would be hard to countenance.

God doesn't seek for golden vessels, and does not ask for silver ones, but He must have clean ones.

No government is safe unless it is protected by the good will of the people.

The nature of love is that it catches you off-guard, subjects you to rules you have never faced, some of them contradictory.

Sometimes when you're listening to a neuroscientist, they have a tendency to use a particular type of jargon that works in their world perfectly but that would lose the average layman.

I'm a Republican. I don't want to go to heaven and have to face my family up there and tell them I voted for a Democrat.