I want to write a film. I need to think of the right idea and focus on that; I love writing.

This sausage roll only contains 2% of your daily intake of calories... if you lick it.

I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands when they first came out. I say 'bought', I actually stole it off a short, fat ginger kid.

I've never laughed a woman into bed, but I've laughed one out of bed many times.

I vote for whoever will annoy my dad.

I hope people think of me as a bit older. I do have a beard. That makes me look very old.

I think people respect honesty rather than hiding it.

I love Downton Abbey. It's just great. My mother giving birth to me was just like Lady Sybil giving birth, except that there wasn't such a tragic ending.

Oh, you wanna do a little bit of roleplay? Could you just play dead?

For the first six months of my stand-up career, I was talking like Danny Dyer. I was doing a lot of 'alright guvnors?' It wasn't true to who I was.

I only got into comedy to get laid

One mind, One master.

Time spent adding value is not wasted

We know how to lead projects, but we forget how to lead people, because we forgot how to lead ourselves.

Ah! That glance of yours did some magic on me, you were not aware of. For once I died and was reborn.

There are days when solitude is a heady wine that intoxicates you with freedom, others when it is a bitter tonic, and still others when it is a poison that makes you beat your head against the wall.

Leadership is stewardship, it's temporary and you're accountable!

I've been making music since I was damn near born. For me to be a producer and be on my sixteenth year making music is a blessing.

Having a magical element in a realistic setting without explanation seems to me to be the hallmark of fairy tales, which present us with a kind of metaphorical look at some aspect of our lives.

Let go of your attachment to being right, and suddenly your mind is more open.

As an historical novelist - there are few jobs more retrospective.