I thought that unless people know me, they wouldn't find me funny.

Lobster is not going to be as tasty with ice tea unless that ice tea is from Long Island.

I remember I was in music class, I was a senior in high school, and my music teacher was like, "You should be a stand-up comic, you could imitate anyone.

My dad always said to go for my hobby and used to commend me for my excellent judgement so i try to do the similar for my children.

In my day we used to have pray to run into an ex looking great, but now you just post a selfie in your underwear.

God did not put you on this earth simplest to be any person's mom.

My music teacher told me that she didn't even know why I was going to college - I should be a stand-up.

The most important thing as a comic and a creator is to have a robust standpoint.

I certainly do care for you Jeff Campbell less than you are always thinking and much more than you are ever knowing

Believe in yourself and the beauty of your dreams.

She was a warrior by day... playing her part. But she slept at night with wishes in her heart.

First reach your target in your mind, then reaching your target in reality will just be a formality!

I might say something in Spanish; it all depends on how I'm feeling, what the situation is.

It's not enough to be compassionate. You must act.

I can't say that I have a biggest inspiration because I look at all positive inspirations. My mom, my dad and my coach, too, inspire me. No one is bigger. I just use it all and take it and use it.

Christ, if he had been a woman, might have been nothing but a great complainer

You want to be interesting? Be interested.

I got to keep a clip for my hair. It had a pretty little dragonfly on it and I got to keep it