I hate being wrong, but I love it when I'm set straight.

You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.

The two most common elements in the universe are Hydrogen and stupidity.

Thank your readers and the critics who praise you, and then ignore them. Write for the most intelligent, wittiest, wisest audience in the universe: Write to please yourself.

I don't mind you thinking I'm stupid, but don't talk to me like I'm stupid.

K is for "Kenghis Khan"; He was a very nice person. History has no record of him. There is a moral in that, somewhere.

In these days of widespread illiteracy, functional illiteracy... anything that keeps people stupid is a felony.

The world is turning into a cesspool of imbeciles.

You must never be afraid to go there.

They minute people fall in love they become liars.

Posing the question: does the god of love use underarm deodorant, vaginal spray and fluoride toothpaste?

I've been through a lot, but I stayed true to who I am.

Eventually, after much dreaming, the dream no longer suffices. You have to physically be there.

Such I hold to be the genuine use of Gunpowder: that it makes all men tall.

Fancy cutting down all those beautiful trees...to make pulp for those bloody newspapers, and calling it civilisation. - Winston Churchill, remarking to his son during a visit to Canada in 1929

It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.

I've always felt that your belongings have never been on a level with you.

I'm the smartest celebrity you've ever f***ing dealt with. I'm not Britney Spears.

All of us contain Music & Truth, but most of us can't get it out.

We must realize that the ministries and gifts of the Spirit are for everyday life, not just meetings.

Berlin is just an affordable European city that's supposed to be cool. There's nothing too deep about it.