Honestly, folks, I think my brain is broken.

You can truly grieve for every officer who's been lost in the line of duty in this country, and still be troubled by cases of police overreach.

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.

There are a hell of a lot of jobs that are scarier than live comedy. Like standing in the operating room when a guy's heart stops, and you're the one who has to fix it!

We have it. The smoking gun. The evidence. The potential weapon of mass destruction we have been looking for as our pretext of invading Iraq. There's just one problem - it's in North Korea.

Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.

I've always liked Atlanta. And not just for the strip clubs, but the shopping and the food.

Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake.

I really like to put my name on everything, so my roommate doesn't steal it. It's really a throwback to that.

I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over.

If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime.

The simplicity of life never ceases to amaze me, and the many ways we complicate it blows my mind.

Hmm, " she hums after a moment."What?""Just thinking...We both want you to get this role.""No sh*t.""And arguing obviously isn't helping us out."I snort. "But that's what we do.

Every single day should be crazy fun.

Logic, it is often said, is the study of valid arguments. It is a systematic attempt to distinguish valid arguments from invalid arguments.

Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection we can catch excellence

As Gansey led the way out, Noah said to Ronan, “I know why you’re mad.”Ronan sneered at him, but his pulse heaved. “Tell me then, prophet.”Noah said, “It’s not my job to tell other people’s secrets.

I'm not necessarily one to be remembered as a great, great speaker in wrestling, but I want to share my feelings about the people who have influenced me over the course of my career.

It is life that does the thinking all around us, forming with playful ease the connections our reason can only laboriously patch together piecemeal, and never to such kaleidoscopic effect.

The world is full of resonances. It constitutes a cosmos of things exerting a spiritual action. The dead matter is a living spirit.