Do unto others as you would have them do to you, said the rapist.

Quotes are for dumb people who can't think of something intelligent to say on their own.

Once a week, I like to slip into a deep existential depression where I lose all my sense of oneness and self-worth.

I love you just the way you are but you don't see you like I do. You shouldn't try so hard to be perfect. Trust me, perfect should try to be you.

I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer

If Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?

Laughter is the best medicine, y'know, besides medicine.

Squaring numbers are just like women. If they're under thirteen, just do them in your head.

If I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I'd still say no.

I stopped and I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So I didn't exist.

Maybe life on earth could be heaven, doesn't just the thought of it make it worth a try?

Time is passing : not leaden steppingBut sprinting on winged feet, Quick silver slipping by.

I am touched that you are trying to comprehend me. A friend could not be more loving.

Be wary of people who go out of their way in charity. They're usually compensating for some evil they're trying to erase.

Sorrow and silence are strong, and patient endurance is godlike.

when my office would require me to either violate my conscience or violate the national interest, then I would resign the office; and I hope any conscientious public servant would do the same.

Old men when they begin to hear the last trumpet, on the morning breeze, often have a kind of absent-minded smile; like people listening. And their smiles are just politeness.

I think a story is an attention grabber. I think it's a truth conveyor. Those are two great features of a good story.

I could not work for a long time. I don't spend very much money. Basically I spend money on food and DVDs.

America does not like people being not nice to dogs.

Forget the known, don't be all the time immersed in your experiences.