Christians and camels receive their burdens kneeling.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

I wasn't fighting with Plushenko. I fought with myself and won

A candid spirit is mightier than the most persistent dogmatism.

Adults need to have fun so children will want to grow up.

Prices in Italy are only slightly lower than in France, which means that Italy is a very expensive country for everyone, natives, visitors and tourists.

Before catechisms can instill a proper humility, small children know the truth that their own existence has caused the world to bloom into being.

I cannot consistently, with self respect, do other than I have, namely, to deliberately violate an act which seems to me to be a denial of everything which ideally and in practice I hold sacred.

No better commentary on the Vedas has been written or can be written.

...All endeavours which are directed to a purely worldly end...contain within themselves the germs of their own corruption.

A lot of my friends inspire my style, and they dont even know it.

Time was when people used to brag about how old they were - and I am old enough to remember it.