Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.

Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average.

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning their windows were shut, they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.

Thank you, God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.

Sometimes there is nothing you can do, and in those times, you must do something anyway.

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor

When the country goes temporarily to the dogs, cats must learn to be circumspect, walk on fences, sleep in trees, and have faith that all this woofing is not the last word.

Success is getting what you want..Happiness is wanting what you get.

I have found my today because my tomorrow has already come.

Young warriors are always eager for battle. Old warriors know better.

First, I'll kill the dog with kindness, and if that doesn't work, I'll just kill him.

One of the trials of life is that we do not usually receive immediately the full blessing for righteousness or the full cursing for wickedness.

I don't think you can ever completely transform yourself on film, but if you do your job well, you can make people believe that you're the character you're trying to be.

I'd heard about Texas football and how much of a religion it is, but to go to Odessa and experience it first-hand is something different than just hearing about it.

I think it's a reflection of the music business in general, which to me seems very fragmented.

I was a huge fan of 'Arrested Development,' and there's just something it tickles in me and it's bright and it's hilarious.

You write to become immortal, or because the piano happens to be open, or you've looked into a pair of beautiful eyes.