As for kissing on the first date, you should never date someone whom you would not wish to kiss immediately.

Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average.

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning their windows were shut, they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.

Thank you, God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.

Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.

Sometimes there is nothing you can do, and in those times, you must do something anyway.

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor

Food-sharing is an innate way that we show our love for people we care about. Including others in times of celebration is an act of kindness.

If you’re not good, I’ll burn your—”“Yeah, I know.” MeShack strolled to his bedroom. “You’ll burn my balls off.

I would like to direct.

God help me if I ever do another movie with an explosion in it. If you see me in a movie where stuff is exploding you'll know I've lost all my money.

It (Strayhorn's Compositions) made us all think a little differently about what we were doing

I never really know what I'm playing. I just follow what sounds good in my head and keep going.

Don't worry about yesterday it ended last night at midnight.

Seventeen's not a good age. That's when you realize that you have a heart. That's when feelings get in the way of thinking.

It doesn't matter what your probability of failure is. If there's a 90% chance of failure, there's a 10% chance of changing the world.

Death by hanging. That, at least, I thought I would be spared.