My Family Quotes

Honor your father and your mother.

Honor your father and mother even as you honor God for all three were partners in your creation.

Remember no matter how many candles you blow out this year there's one gal who will always think of you as young strong and handsome - your mother.

God could not be everywhere therefore he made mothers.

Parents are often so busy with the physical rearing of children that they miss the glory of parenthood just as the grandeur of the trees is lost when raking leaves.

The best inheritance a parent can give his children is a few minutes of his time each day.

If I had known how wonderful it would be to have grandchildren I'd have had them first.

Of all the things which wisdom provides to make us entirely happy much the greatest is the possession of friendship.

Friendship is the only cement that will ever hold the world together.

When a friend is in trouble don't annoy him by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it.

Friendship improves happiness and abates misery by doubling our joy and dividing our grief.

It is not what you give your friend but what you are willing to give him that determines the quality of your friendship.

It is not the talking that counts between friends it is the never needing to say what counts.

True friendship comes when silence between two people is comfortable.

Treat your friends as you do your pictures and place them in their best light.

Friendships are fragile things and require as much care in handling as any other fragile and precious thing.

Every man should have a fair-sized cemetery in which to bury the faults of his friends.

Since there is nothing so well worth having as friends never lose a chance to make them.

You can make more friends in two months by becoming more interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get people interested in you.

Old friends are best. King James used to call for his old shoes they were the easiest for his feet.

Each of us has a spark of life inside us and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark in one another.

Sometimes our light goes out but is blown into flame by another human being. Each of us owes deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this light.

Insanity is hereditary you get it from your children.

The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires.

Happiness is having a large loving caring close-knit family ... in another city.

Human beings are the only creatures on Earth that allow children to come back home.

Children have become so expensive that only the poor can afford them.

Never brag about your ancestors coming over on the Mayflower the immigration laws weren't as strict in those days.

Whenever I'm with my [teenager] I feel as though I have to spend the whole time avoiding land mines.

They are doing away with drive-ins. Now where are the teenagers going to go to not watch a movie?

Big sisters are the crabgrass in the lawn of life.

My son has taken up meditation - at least it's better than sitting doing nothing.

A scout is a boy who dresses like a schmuck. A scoutmaster is a schmuck who dresses like a boy.

It appears there's a little too much chlorine in their gene pool.

In America there are two classes of travel - first class and with children.

I think a dysfunctional family is any family with more than one person in it.

Family is just accident. . . . They don't mean to get on your nerves. They don't even mean to be your family they just are.

We're supposed to take our problems to a family adviser. Personally I've never met a family adviser. They're all off somewhere listening to dirty stories.

Have children while your parents are still young enough to take care of them.

Let's face it there's lots of spoiled kids out there . . . because you can't spank Grandma.

You know your children are growing up when they stop asking where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.

I hate housework! You make the beds you do the dishes - and six months later you have to start all over again.

I don't want to say anything about my kids . . . but I go to PTA meetings under an assumed name!

The Jewish man with parents still alive is a fifteen-year-old boy and will remain a fifteen-year-old boy until they die.

Few mistakes can be made by a mother-in-law who is willing to baby-sit.

Adolescence is when children start trying to bring up their parents.

It takes about five years for a walnut tree to produce nuts but this is not true of a family tree.

My father never raised his hand to any one of his children - except in self-defense.

To encourage my little kid to eat I'd sometimes say: "Just pretend it's sand."

Sis I've been wondering . . . On my birthday mom always gives me five thousand dollars. How much does she give you?