Paul Reubens Quotes

I probably have become more infamous from two misdemeanors than probably anyone I could think of.

I know you are, but what am I?

There's a lotta things about me you don't know anything about, Dottie. Things you wouldn't understand. Things you couldn't understand. Things you shouldn't understand.

There were just things in Disney movies that probably were too scary for kids.

I wouldn't sell my bike for all the money in the world. Not for a hundred million, trillion, billion dollars!

I'm right-handed, and the police report said I was jerking off with my left hand. That would have been the end of the case right there, proof it couldn't have been me.

I've always felt like a kid, and I still feel like a kid, and I've never had any problem tapping into my childhood, and my kid side.

I enjoy getting to be arty and quirky and weird and all the things that I don't have that much choice with. You just sort of use what you got.

I was always in disguise. I'd wear masks or weird get-ups so you couldn't recognize me. I was always afraid that if somebody caught on that it was me, I'd never work again.

I was looking for a last name that was a first name. Growing up, I knew a kid who was the most obnoxious kid I ever knew, and his last name was Herman.

I take having a kids' show real seriously. I think it's an enormous responsibility.

In my experience I haven't met too many uptight black people. I'm sure they're out there. Like I'm some big authority and I've lived in the inner city and ghetto.

I think my entire career path was determined for me when I was 6 years old, watching reruns of 'I Love Lucy' on TV and thinking about making people laugh.

We're in a situation now where fewer and fewer small films get made. People want these big giant tentpole sort of things, and I don't know, it's getting harder and harder to make a small movie.

I think the first time I was on The David Letterman Show, he didn't quite know what to expect. I think people generally are just a little afraid.

I feel the only way I'm going to be successful in moving on is if I keep a separation.

Part of what I do comes from the fact that I don't know any jokes to tell. And when I do they're really flat and don't work.

I don't really want to direct myself, but I'm certainly torn in that direction.

The original suit was designed by a guy named Mr. Jay from Hollywood. But nowadays I'm having the suit duplicated. At this point I have about three good suits and about three really raggedy ones.

I'd love to do a talk show. But I'm too busy for it. It's just too much work.

I just feel in a lot of ways black people are so much looser and cooler. Just as a culture, it's so much more real.

I'm the person with the final say on everything. I really love being in that position.

I can be on the Tonight Show, but not with Johnny [Carson]. He uses my name in his monologue all the time.

The public already knows about me more than I ever wanted it to know.

I would love to be in Kansas.

I have a deal with a company that's going to do cards without the gum. I don't like sugarless gum, and I don't think it's much better for you.

I'd love to work with Francis Ford Coppola. I met Coppola on an airplane.

People read so much into what I do. It's fascinating to me because some of it's probably there, but I haven't thought of it.

I don't think Bruce Willis can compete with me. I have a much better voice.

It's a lot easier to say you're a comic than a performance artist.

I'm fortunately not in a situation where someone owns me.

I call it... the hot dog tree, because... it's a hot dog tree.