Kin Hubbard Quotes

Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt.

Who remembers when we used to rest on Sunday instead of Monday?

Where ignorance is bliss it's foolish to borrow your neighbor's newspaper.

It's pretty hard to be efficient without being obnoxious.

The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.

The world gets better every day - then worse again in the evening.

If there's anything a public servant hates to do it's something for the public.

There's no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn't tell you about it?

Flattery won't hurt you if you don't swallow it.

The reason the way of the transgressor is hard is because it's so crowded.

A sadder but wiser man is a thousand times more agreeable to meet than the feller that never makes a mistake.

One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mousetrap you set the night before.

When some fellers decide to retire nobody knows the difference.

When some folks agree with my opinions I begin to suspect I'm wrong.

The election is not very far off when a candidate can recognize you across the street.

A fellow ought to save a few of the long evenings he spends with his girl till after they're married.

Nobody kicks on being interrupted if it's by applause.

A friend that ain't in need is a friend indeed.

A bee is never as busy as it seems; it's just that it can't buzz any slower.

If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on a vacation.

I will say this for adversity: people seem to be able to stand it, and that is more than I can say for prosperity.

If capital and labor ever do get together it's good night for the rest of us.

Everything comes to him who waits, except a loaned book.

Being an optimist after you've got everything you want doesn't count.

Folks that blurt out just what they think wouldn't be so bad if they thought.

Kindness goes a long ways lots of times when it ought to stay at home.

Some people are so sensitive that they feel snubbed if an epidemic overlooks them.

If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy.

There are two ways to handle a woman, and nobody knows either of them.

Fashion: a barricade behind which men hide their nothingness.

A never-failing way to get rid of a fellow is to tell him something for his own good.

An optimist is a fellow who believes what's going to be will be postponed

Nobuddy ever listened t' reason on a empty stomach.

Beauty is . . . a valuable asset if you're poor or haven't any sense.

No matter how much strong black coffee we drink, almost any after- dinner speech will counteract it.

Very often the quiet fellow has said all he knows

It ain't a bad plan to keep still occasionally even when you know what you're talking about.

Some folks pay a compliment like they went down in their pocket for it.

Bargain... anything a customer thinks a store is losing money on.

Plain spoken people get most of the recognition because folks are afraid of them.

A sympathizer is a fellow that's for you as long as it doesn't cost anything.

Women seem to be all right on bargains till it comes to picking out a husband.

The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing.

None but the brave can live with the fair.

Every once in a while someone without a single bad habit gets caught.

Litigation: A form of hell whereby money is transferred from the pockets of the proletariat to that of lawyers.

I don't look for much to come out of government ownership as long as we have Democrats and Republicans.

Of all the unbearable nuisances, the ignoramus that has traveled is the worst.

Only one fellow in ten thousand understands the currency question, and we meet him every day.

One of the commonest mistakes is thinking your worries are over when your children get married.