Eric Idle Quotes

I believe in the separation of church and planet.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will make me go in a corner and cry by myself for hours.

A lot has been said about politics; some of it complimentary, but most of it accurate

Learn to trust yourself. That's very vital. ... Just stand with yourself. Remember, in his lifetime, Van Gogh sold only two paintings. I personally sold even fewer.

Life doesn't make any sense, and we all pretend it does. Comedy's job is to point out that it doesn't make sense, and that it doesn't make much difference anyway.

Life is a comedy when watching and a tragedy when experiencing. I try and share anything I have.

Life took over 4 billion years to evolve into you, and you've about 70 more years to enjoy it. Don't just pursue happiness, catch it.

Never do things for money. It's always the things you do for love that turn out to pay the best.

Life has a very simple plot: first you're here and then you're not.

Of the sparkling wines, the most famous is Perth Pink. This is a bottle with a message in, and the message is "beware". This is not a wine for drinking; this is a wine for laying down and avoiding.

I've got soggy thighs. It must be dinner time.

Even if you've written something for print, I think it's good to try [it] out on someone because it changes. You can think it's hilarious and they can tell you it's not.

No day of my life passes without someone saying the words 'Monty Python' to me. It's not bad.

John Cleese once told me he'd do anything for money. So I offered him a pound to shut up, and he took it.

At least in America, you have freedom of speech, which is a good thing. It's just a question of whether you're allowed to use it on 'Fox News'.

Know what I mean? Eh, eh, Nudge nudge, Say no more?

I got used to dealing with groups of boys and getting on with life in unpleasant circumstances and being smart and funny and subversive at the expense of authority.

If anything can survive the probe of humour it is clearly of value, and conversely all groups who claim immunity from laughter are claiming special privileges which should not be granted.

Elvis saved my life when I was 13 or 14. He saved all our lives.

The Minister of Transport issued this appeal to motorists: Can anyone give him a lift to Leicester?

A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat!

I think you often learn from failure. Success just teaches you how great you were, but in fact it's knowing what will fail that will help you to make the right choices.

They're a typical Hollywood audience. All the kids are on drugs and all the adults are on roller skates.

I think the special thing about Python is that it's a writers' commune. The writers are in charge. The writers decide what the material is.

I like the idea of being out there regularly with an audience and with a funny gang of people. That's what I grew up with - doing television, doing shows every week.

People can tell the truth much more freely when they're apparently lying.

Talent is always more interesting - ambition is not interesting. If you have talent, you have to find ways of expressing it, but you may not be a success in the world's terms.

What's brown and sounds like a bell? DUNG!

At Cambridge, you have to kiss the vice-chancellor's fingers. But I missed out on that, 'cause I was doing a matinee. I don't want to kiss a strange man's fingers anyway.

The dreadful thing about getting older is you cry at the drop of a hat.

People who are interested in money are really uninteresting people. They look like Donald Trump.

I will jump on anybody's private plane at the drop of a hat. I'm an old-fashioned lower-middle-class boy.

If the studios paid the artists, how would they ever be able to afford the executives?

Don't want to turn into mini-me.

We destroy icons - that's what we do.

Nobody gets irony anymore, as we are now living in the post-ironic age. Once George Bush gets a library, our irony is dead.

Subversion is what I do.

I pay taxes in three countries, but can't vote in any of them.

Executives do not on the whole do well with comedy. They can't understand it, they can't read it, they can't spot it.

I don't like animation. I hate animation, actually.

I don't necessarily know much about comedy, I don't spend a lot of time watching it. Mainly because all my life for about 50 years I've had comedy.

Americans like to think 'Python' is how English people really are. There is an element of truth to that.

There's animals like us existing and thinking and giving interviews on Australian television.

You get interviewed when you're out promoting something.

I hate movies. They're so boring. So tedious.

My first professional job was appearing in a disastrous theatre production of Oh, What a Lovely War in Leicester Rep, shortly after leaving Cambridge.

The idea that we evolved with these thoughts is actually very fascinating - to me.

I never think in terms of target audience. I try to write what makes me laugh, so I'm the target audience. I guess I just hope there's another person in America like me.

I won't read scripts because I have a limited amount of time. Why should I help other people do lame stuff when I can just go out and put on lame stuff of my own?

I used to collect Persian rugs and real estate - you should be able to walk on and live in your money. I had to give up the rugs because I'm allergic to mould.