When I was in the business as a young performer, it was a recognised fact that when you got to 60 you were out, because there'd be a new crop of comics coming up all the time, every 10 years or so.

It may be an old cliche, but I think true love will last; it has no end. But finding the right person is a very difficult thing.

I'm not even really a joke-teller. I can do ad-lib and banter, but I don't do jokes.

When a performer doesn't get nervous, that is when you have to give up.

Puerto Rico is one of those places you can be as quiet or as crazy as you want, because there's so much nightlife. I have to take the craziness carefully.

You can shuffle my deck any day!

It could still be a good night if you play your cards right.

I don't do close-ups any more. I am better looking from the waist downwards.

Nice to see you, to see you nice

It gets harder every day to get out of bed. I don't feel like it loads of the time. It is only my exercise routine which wakes me up.

There are enough tears in any child's life; we certainly don't need to add to them in the name of entertainment.

Until we see what we are we cannot take steps to become what we should be.

I wonder how many times we dream that kind of dream-something strange and illogical-and fail to realize God is trying to tell us something.

We are plated with piety, not alloyed with it.

I'm not a professional politician. I'm a professional problem solver.

It is curious how tyrannical the habit of reading is, and what shifts we make to escape thinking. There is no bore we dread being left alone with so much as our own minds.

Dogs never lie about love.

Computers are stupid.

There is nothing so difficult to marry as a large nose.

Paradigms are powerful because they create the lens through which we see the world.

The common perception is it only happens to people who aren't paying attention.