What drives the creative person is that we see it all.

When life gives you lemons don't make lemonade, make pink lemonade. Be unique.

I noticed recently, in the last few shows I did, that I'm starting to get people - not a large group, but quite a few people - who come to see me because they love Curb Your Enthusiasm.

If you feel like there's something out there that you're supposed to be doing, if you have a passion for it, then stop wishing and just do it.

I'm here today because I refused to be unhappy. I took a chance.

Don't bother me while I'm eating, or when I'm coming out of the crackhouse or something. Just let me get going.

And then also I think it's harder for women because comedy is so opposite of being ladylike.

Some government workers are dedicated and work hard, but most of them are just waiting to retire.

If you're passionate about your work, it makes the people around you want to be involved too.

I don't like the saying keep your friends close and enemies closer. I want my enemy on a different planet.

I don’t understand why people really get upset about something that doesn’t affect them at all.

How much self-love comes in the guise of selfless devotion!

Science is a differential equation. Religion is a boundary condition.

I'm not much of a famous-person friend. I've hung out with Brooke Shields and I don't think I've ever seen that kind of pure face recognition, but I keep a low profile.

I can sum it up like this: Thank God for the game of golf.

I actually have two children now, and sometimes I wonder if that's it. Because they do make writing and directing more complicated and more difficult, especially now that they're very young.

No man can be an agnostic who has a sense of humour.

Whoopi and I have been friends ever since she claimed she couldn't sing on the set of Sister Act.

I treat every race the same. We all wanted to swim fast today and give something back to the crowd.

I like surfing; I bring a surfboard with me on tour.

Conspicuous consumption of valuable goods is a means of reputability to the gentleman of leisure.