We do not tell old friends beneath our roof-tree that they are an offence to the eyesight.

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.

It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

I always advise people never to give advice.

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.

It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.

As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

Let us make the earth peaceful to enjoy the joy and beauty of spring.

We are always afraid to ask because we aren't afraid of the answer but the feeling of rejection

Which do I care more about - demanding my rights or displaying right choices?

I tend to be pessimistic. I want to believe in hope.

If anyone asks you what kind of music you play, tell him 'pop.' Don't tell him 'rock 'n' roll' or they won't even let you in the hotel.

I am a big foodie, so much so that I eat in every half an hour. This is the secret of my glowing skin.

How will I ever get out of this labyrinth!

You can't murder a man who's been dead for five centuries.

I always dreamed of making it in baseball, but life has moved pretty quickly for me.

Louis B. Mayer once looked at me and said, "You will never get the girl at the end." So I worked on my acting.