The only possible reason the Republicans have declared a war on women is they must think women have oil.

As we go from Abraham Lincoln to Theodore Roosevelt to Mitt Romney, I now understand why the Republicans don't believe in evolution.

I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.

Other countries care for their mentally ill. Making them debate on TV is just cruel.

The baby Jesus was the last homeless person the Republicans liked.

Call me a dreamer, but I think it would be great if getting medical attention were as easy as getting a gun.

It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads.

Maybe this is crazy, but I think the right to own a gun is trumped by the right not to be shot by one.

If its platform is any guide, the Republican party is staunchly pro-life until you are actually born.

If Mark Twain had had Twitter, he would have been amazing at it. But he probably wouldn't have gotten around to writing Huckleberry Finn.

It used to be that people could be painfully boring in private. Facebook changed all that.

Water is the driving force in nature.

nDear smokers, when you burn one stick you not only burnrelationships but also burn your one and only life.

We're not freaks, Tally. We're normal. We may not be gorgeous, but at least we're not hyped-up Barbie dolls.

Beauty is the greatest seducer of man.

Self - development should be a perpetual process. In life you are either growing or rotting. You're moving forward or backwards; there is no standing still.

The old world is dying, and the new world struggles to be born; now is the time of monsters

In Puppies Behind Bars, when the puppy is eight weeks old it is given to an inmate. The inmate is responsible for the dog.

Just one great idea can change your life dramatically. Look for it. It's there somewhere!

We are more unhappy to see people ahead of us than happy to see people behind us.

But such is the irresistable nature of truth, that all it asks, and all it wants is the liberty of appearing.