I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.

As we go from Abraham Lincoln to Theodore Roosevelt to Mitt Romney, I now understand why the Republicans don't believe in evolution.

Other countries care for their mentally ill. Making them debate on TV is just cruel.

The baby Jesus was the last homeless person the Republicans liked.

Call me a dreamer, but I think it would be great if getting medical attention were as easy as getting a gun.

It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads.

Maybe this is crazy, but I think the right to own a gun is trumped by the right not to be shot by one.

If its platform is any guide, the Republican party is staunchly pro-life until you are actually born.

The only possible reason the Republicans have declared a war on women is they must think women have oil.

If Mark Twain had had Twitter, he would have been amazing at it. But he probably wouldn't have gotten around to writing Huckleberry Finn.

It used to be that people could be painfully boring in private. Facebook changed all that.

There is power in confronting your fears. In knowing what it is you fear above all, you can prevent it from becoming your reality. There are always choices.

If you answer fire with fire, only the fire will be the winner.Si al fuego se le contesta con fuego, sólo el fuego vencerá. #quote

I do not think that obsession is funny or that not being able to stop one's intensity is funny.

Videos destroyed the vitality of rock and roll. Before that, music said, "Listen to me." Now it says, "Look at me."

I don't know how women stop being friends with other women.

When I was in my freshman year at college I took some acting classes and found that I fell in love with it again.

As a cameraman, I was paid to stand within a few feet of Yehudi Menuhin performing. I saw Rudolph Nureyev dancing. I couldn't believe I was being paid for that.

Be proud to be a decent American rather than a wanker whipping up fear.

My only real claim to anyone's attention lies in my writing

There is a great deal of pain in life and perhaps the only pain that can be avoided is the pain that comes from trying to avoid pain.