The eagle may soar; beavers build dams.

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.

We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics.

The US has not imposed democracy in Yemen, its people have.

The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine.

Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth.

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking.

The government is shutting down the coal industry, they say it's cheaper to draw nuclear power off the French grid and cheaper to buy coal from Colombia.

He who writes prose builds his temple to Fame in rubble; he who writes verses builds it in granite. - Edward George Earle Lytton Bulwer-Lytton, first Baron Lytton

See them so it seems that humanity is dead.

Assisted him? Dylan made the repairs. I only fell and hit my head, from what I can recall. Yes, I make excellent deadweight.

Let's get on our knees and pray. I don't know to whom. Is there a patron saint of ballistics gel?

You are your own scriptwriter and the play is never finished, no matter what your age or position in life.

As machines become more and more efficient and perfect, so it will become clear that imperfection is the greatness of man.

I have the obsessiveness of someone who's a sober, recovering addict displacing his addiction. Except I never had the addiction.

The art of an actress is sublimated sexuality. But off the stage the fire must be able to reconvert the steam into body.

I'm actually not someone who believes in heaven or anything like that.

Titles do not count with posterity.

I always want to go back and do stand-up; I like the freedom.