Someone called all the newspapers in New York and told them I'd died. I've been told by almost everyone it was an ex-wife - I've had a few so it's hard to pinpoint which one - but who knows for sure?

The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.

I ain't no movie star, man. I'm a booty star.

I believe the ability to think is blessed. If you can think about a situation, you can deal with it. The big struggle is to keep your head clear enough to think.

A lie is profanity. A lie is the worst thing in the world. Art is the ability to tell the truth.

Two things people throughout history have had in common are hatred and humour. I am proud that I have been able to use humour to lessen people's hatred.

I'm not addicted to cocaine. I just like the way it smells.

Booty is just a ghetto expression, and I'm just a booty star.

All humor is rooted in pain.

I had some great things and I had some bad things. The best and the worst . . . In other words, I had a life.

If I thought about it, I could be bitter, but I don't feel like being bitter. Being bitter makes you immobile, and there's too much that I still want to do.

In reading the lives of great men, I found that the first victory they won was over themselves... self-discipline with all of them came first.

From an evolutionary standpoint you can't just wipe everything out and start over, and I don't think you can do it in the school system either.

I think I'm getting a little bit of Alzheimer's. Just a little.

next to it was a dvd called 'as i get laid dying,' which had a hospital scene on the front. it was like grey's anatomy, only with less grey and more anatomy.

I will accept your influence, guidance and direction if (and only if) I believe that you and I share similar goals.

The long, long road over the moors and up into the forest - who trod it into being first of all? Man, a human being, the first that came here. There was no path before he came.

Apparently, as a kid, I used to eat spiders. Maybe there's some Freudian significance behind that.

I'm the band leader. That's not to say that the other people are my minions - they all put in a tremendous amount of personality, and push the music in ways I would never expect.

Growing is an important part of the business, but more important than that is to get better.

Tis misfortune that awakens ingenuity, or fortitude, or endurance, in hearts where these qualities had never come to life but for the circumstance which gave them a being.