My son asked for very little - a kickstand, with a motorcycle attached.

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.

If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.

Laughter is an instant vacation.

Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies.

The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired.

Laughter is the best medicine in the world.

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases.

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

True humility is not thinking less of yourself

People say baseball players should go out and have fun. No way. To me, baseball is pressure, I always feel it. This is work. The fun is afterwards, when you shake hands.

What terrible tragedies realism inflicts on people.

It could fairly be said that America, during the Bush years, has entered an Age of Denial - arguably the first stage of a nation's decline.

The thing that inspires me most is reading and just observing the people around me. I think those are the two things that make me want to write.

I think God's justice is making wrongs right.

If you do the best thing everyday of your life, but nothing shakes you nor shakes the table for you and others, it is stale and its not worth it.

They try to engage the world as much as they can and we will continue until they leave our land.

I don't hate it. It does no good to hate something you can't change.

Evolutionary cosmology formulates theories in which a universe is capable of giving rise to and generating future universes out of itself, within black holes or whatever.