My interest in magic was kindled by Steve Martin, the comedian I'd gone to high school with.

Golfers don't scream. Golfers just adjust the pleats in their pants and go from there. That's about as antagonistic as we get.

He hits the ball a long way and he knows how to win.

He's in the mold of a Tom Watson, in that he'll hit the ball in the trees and undaunted go it there, flail it out and make something out of it.

They don't cut the greens here at Augusta. they use bikini wax.

I don't putt face-on exclusively, but in the back on my mind I'm haunted by the notion that I'm sure it's the best way to putt.

He's got an overall flair for the game. It looks to me like he really loves what he does and he can't wait to get up in the morning, go hit some balls and go play.

I'm nearsighted in my right eye, have glaucoma in my left, and the nerves in my hands are on Medicare. Basically, I'm on the wrong end of a short sale.

My career started slowly and then tapered off.

I hate to repeat lines, to say the same damned thing. I try to rewrite cliches and make what I say sound fresh.

I made nothing happen very slowly.

We are truly human when we live for a purpose far above ourselves

Don't let anyone tell your story. Pick up a pen and write your own.

Gratitude makes the world a softer, kinder place. It softens that brittle shell of defence. There is always something to be grateful for, no matter how small or simple.

Cat love is genuine, because it's 10 percent devotion and 90 percent frustration and betrayal. - 67 REASONS WHY CATS ARE BETTER THAN DOGS

Sometimes gentle sometimes capricious sometimes awful never the same for two moments together almost human in its passions almost spiritual in its tenderness almost Divine in its infinity.

The moon is so beautiful. It's a big silver dollar, flipped by God. And it landed scarred side up, see? So He made the world.

The ears were made, not for such trivial uses as men are wont to suppose, but to hear celestial sounds.

The role of television is the illusion of company, noise. I call it the fifth wall and the second window: the window of illusion.

A political convention is just not a place where you come away with any trace of faith in human nature.

The dubious privilege of a freelance writer is he’s given the freedom to starve anywhere.