Maybe that is why in my comedy I try and puncture the hypocrisy all around us, why it is almost a crusade with me to strip life down to what really is true.

I had a blind date with a dentist — and he told me to come back in six months.

People say it is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money you can have a key made.

I said, "Is there!" I told him there is a Mafia school where they teach them math — if Johnny has ten fingers and they cut off two, how many does he have left?

Somehow, some way, every person in the arts has to find an accommodation with disappointment and embarrassment. They are the pollen in the air we breathe.

Laughing made me feel safe. I was not going to be enveloped by the seediness that coated this world like dust.

I am driven. Being driven is my energy source. It is my fun.…I believe that where there is action, there is movement, and those ripples will eventually produce something positive.

The revelation that personal truth can be the foundation of comedy, that outrageousness can be cleansing and healthy…

The act of creation fascinates me. You can only sit with blank page and wait. You cannot press a button, cannot program it.

Everything comes out of smoke and mist and nothingness, a mystical happening…

Liked" was the kiss of death. "Loved" or "hated" interested him. At least the performer had aroused emotion.

Ahead and to the west was our ranger station - and the mountains of Idaho, poems of geology stretching beyond any boundaries and seemingly even beyond the world.

I fell asleep that night in the arms of a killer. I'd never slept better.

My workout was running down fly balls, stealing a base, or running for my life on the football field.

You can’t get second things by putting them first. You get second things only by putting first things first.

Never let an earthly circumstance disable you spiritually.

Save the stonewall to build the levees.

Longing hearts could only stand so much longing.

Democracies don't prepare well for things that have never happened before.

A custom-tailored suit retains a certain dignity about it.

Music criticism should be to musicians what ornithology is to the birds.