Let's toast a real wine expert - someone who knows a good rose goes best with bologna sandwiches.

She claims she just turned thirty but it must have been a U-turn!

He is at an age that whenever a pretty girl smiles at him he immediately looks down to see what is unzipped.

For him any wine dated before four o'clock in the afternoon is vintage.

Here's a toast to someone who's truly a best friend - a person who goes around telling good things behind your back.

She is such a health food nut she thinks a grape is wine in pill form.

The only way she could get a standing ovation would be if she sang "The Star-Spangled Banner."

You can easily tell he's a newlywed because he's still smiling at his mother-in-law.

He must really be a big success - even his mother-in-law admits it.

Every endured a hardship is a discipline in the spirit.

He dusted off the shoulder tab and stared at it, so light in his hand, so inconsequential. It was hard to believe that a shred of cloth could have so much destructive power locked away in it.

Everybody sells something to somebody every day, whether it’s a product, a service or just a case of making sure that they get their own way.

A woman hath nine lives like a cat.

In geometry, as in nature, the circle is the archetypal shape of wholeness and inclusion. It is an effective shape for nonprofits or community-focused efforts.

When man listens, God speaks; when man obeys, God acts; when man prays, God empowers.

At the end of life thoughts hitherto impossible come to the collected mind, like good spirits which let themselves down from the shining heights of the past.

I did not grow up in the church. I'm not a church-goer now. I'm a very spiritual person.

Self-righteous victims invite extra nails.

It's better to feel sorry for doing something bad than to feel superior for doing something good.