Instead of slashing my wrists, I just write a bunch of really crummy songs.

I think anyone who has an opinion, and voices it, will offend someone.

It's a funny thing, when you talk to God, you're religious, but when he talks to you, you're a psychopath.

I was fine, until I was born. And it's been downhill ever since.

Base not your joy on the deeds of others. For what has been given can be taken away.

People ask how I learned to play bass with one hand. Well, with a face like mine, you learn to do a lot of things with one hand.

We live to avoid death, we exist to avoid unexistence

It's bad poetry executed by people that can't sing. That's my definition of Rap.

I hate the human race. Of course, therefore, I hate myself the most, because I am the least of the human race.

I'm the product of 6 million years of evolution? Come on, man. I crawled out of a swamp yesterday.

It seems to be that southern Europeans are just more intimate socially, whereas I like a lot of personal space - like, a mile from the nearest person is fine for me.

the only true path to your dream is to perceive what others dim illogical

The most successful men in the end are those whose success is the result of steady accretion.

My wife watches me like a hawk.

I've been failing for, like, ten or eleven years. When it turns, it'll turn. Right now I'm just trying to squeeze through a very tight financial period, get the movie out, and put my things in order.

You know, larger-than-life politicians have larger-than-life strengths and larger-than-life weaknesses.

Its better to get smart than to get mad. I try not to get so insulted that I will not take advantage of an opportunity to persuade people to change their minds.

Stereotypes work to help divide women from recognizing their common interests.

Once you try, golf is the hardest game you'll ever play.

Whoso desireth to govern well and securely, it behoveth him to have a vigilant eye to the proceedings of great princes, and to consider seriously of their designs.

I am watching the Earth. The visibility is good. I feel well and cheerful. The machine is functioning normally.