I would say if you are having a tough time in your life, then going to a club and getting laughs, it does make you feel better for that hour and a half show. It gets your mind off of it.

You, the actor, must be aware of when you're being funny, but the character you're playing should always be oblivious to the fact.

Nobody with a victim mentality will get anywhere. Ever. They will never succeed.

I feel lucky that I'm working at all. I don't take any job for granted. I enjoy this. It's all enjoyable for me. It's all part of it.

The problem with the economy isn't that people aren't paying their fair share of taxes.

I would love to have a part opposite a great actor - like, say, Pacino or De Niro or Hoffman. And to work with a top director. That's my dream.

My dad would always say, 'What can you do to make the world a better place?' Well, I can make people laugh.

If you build it, nerds will come.

I didn't take anything from anyone - first of all. Second of all, I opened a comedy club with money that I saved over 25 years. I created jobs.

Sometimes the best way to make 'em laugh is to show 'em how you honestly feel.

Apparently, I said what a lot of people are thinking and a lot of people have thanked me.

Death is our constant companion, and it is death that gives each person's life its true meaning.

The press is hostile to Donald Trump, they always will be. And Donald Trump is happy to return the favor. And you know what, he actually has the upper hand in that relationship.

You can't be young always. The day will come when everything will fall apart.

His mind is so open - so open that ideas simply pass through it.

I love comedy. God has given me this platform.

Being with my family is very important to me, and touring is very important to me, too, because it's who I am. It's what I do.

A golden tomb is useful only for the thieves!

Well, I'm writing everything that isn't my final project, so that when I actually sit down to write it, that's all that will be left in my mind.

Does experience help? NO! Not if we are doing the wrong things.

Wisdom and spirit of the Universe!