I want to eat, cook, meet famous people and make fun of them.

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.

Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself.

I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

Excuse the mess but we live here.

As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job.

Half the world's starving; the other half is trying to lose weight.

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the bigger we are, the more space we'll take up, and the more we'll have to be reckoned with.

I call myself a 'domestic goddess.

Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive?

I quit smoking. I feel better. I smell better. And it's safer to drink out of old beer cans laying around the house.

To restore a lost relationship is your choice

That’s how it felt – that the loss of him had a life of its own. I lived with it as I could have lived with him. Some nights it was quiet and sometimes it pounded on my door.

To write an autobiography, you've got to expose other people. I hope to get out of this world as gracefully as possible, without embarrassing anyone.

Human dignity is more precious than prestige.

A chic guy is in a suit. I don't care what kind of tie they wear. I don't care if they even wear a tie, as long as they can carry a suit.

If you reach for the stars you may find yourself touching the sky.

We've come to the point where we're no longer able to protect our national values. Where will it all end?

I wish to call on you to join hands in the building of a world in which less people will be forced to flee, and in which refugees are protected until they can safely return home one day.

Dermot Reeve was so self-obsessed that even on the local nudist beach he only admired himself

Imagine the clouds dripping Dig a hole in your garden to put them in