I've always wanted children... not of my own, but for yard work and reaching into tight places to get things I've dropped.

If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.

Life is what you make of it, unless you have tourette's, in which case much becomes involuntary.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Cupcakes are the tattooed brunette chick of the baked goods world.

Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

Happiness is a carnival game. It's never as easy as it looks, but the dumb ones always seem to be walking around with a big stuffed animal.

It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.

The level of success you achieve will be in direct proportion to the depth of your commitment.

...an irresistible of why we read and why we love.We are not quite novels.We are not quite short stories.In the end, we are collected works.

Me too thy nobleness has taughtTo master my despair

There is no question- love is the answer

I think our material is our lives. That's part of being a modern writer, and we have to use it.

It's hard to beat somebody when they don't give up.

I had one drama teacher who was amazing, Ms. Perkins. She really tried to inspire me and get me going.

Give me a thousand kisses, then a hundred, then a thousand more.

Who talks much, must talk in vain.

The lack of carbohydrates can make you a little crazy.