I cannot imagine any crime worse than taking a life, can you? -It'd depend whose life.

New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment... a place where you're least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.

The most important things to do in the world are to get something to eat, something to drink and somebody to love you.

It's not that the Irish are cynical. It's rather that they have a wonderful lack of respect for everything and everybody.

I have never seen a situation so dismal that a policeman couldn't make it worse.

They took away our land, our language, and our religion; but they could never harness our tongues.

The terrorist is the one with the small bomb.

I only take a drink on two occasions - when I'm thirsty and when I'm not.

I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

Other people have a nationality. The Irish and the Jews have a psychosis.

The only thing I envy in young people is their livers.

Elevate your mind and you elevate your world.

Do not indoctrinate your children. Teach them how to think for themselves, how to evaluate evidence, and how to disagree with you.

One's nature is like a mountain

Every man has problems that only life insurance can solve. In the young man’s case, the problem is to create cash; for the older man, to conserve it.

He would usually study with a small group of students, men and women.

Children desperately need to know - and to hear in ways they understand and remember - that they're loved and valued by mom and dad.

Aphorism, n.: A concise, clever statement you don’t think of until too late.

I can't wait to get off the stage, because I've got some LifeSavers in my pocket and pineapple is next!

The greatest misfortune that can come to a human being is to lose his inner peace. No outer force can rob him of it. It is his own thoughts, his own actions, that rob him of it.

The true Mason takes full responsibility for the condition of his character and ever strives for its perfection.