Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog.

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk.

To err is human; to admit it, superhuman.

Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible.

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.

Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.

The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball.

Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible.

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.

More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success.

My childhood was a drag show!

I cared about us. But the cold hard truth was, nothing I said or did could realign the stars.

When humans find themselves surrounded by nothing but objects, the response is always one of loneliness.

I wanted to create something that would live on forever, beyond my time, and out of that came Cashmere Mist.

If he ever left me, I wouldn't even be sad; no, 'cause there's a blessing in every lesson, and I'm glad that I knew him at all.

Life's pretty good, and why wouldn't it be? I'm a pirate, after all.

Empathy is the main thing, putting yourself in somebody else's shoes and trying not to judge.

I think we'd be very foolish to expect that we can just import everything from somewhere else and imagine that that's going to last for ever and ever and ever

There's something unsettling about being continually sold something.

Wherever women gather together failure is impossible.