Elvis, heal me, save me. Elvis, make me be born again in the perfect Elvis light.

Elvis is everywhere. Elvis is everything. Elvis is everybody. Elvis is still The King.

Rave music sounds like an electronic disco version of '30s Universal monster movies.

When I look out into your faces, you know what I see? I see a little bit of Elvis in each and every one of you out there.

National 21 drinking age, huh, what do you think about that? A bunch of malarkey, whatever malarkey is, man, it's a whole bunch of it.

Tiffany is wrestling in Jell-O.

Me and Don Henley are fast acquaintances now, or something. He actually got on stage and sang with me.

People from outer space they come up to me, they don't look like Doctor Spock, they don't look like Klingons, all that Star Trek jive. They look like Elvis.

I graduated from college in Ohio and bummed around for a while, and then I joined VISTA, which was a domestic Peace Corps kind of thing, and they sent me to Colorado.

Debbie Gibson is pregnant with my two headed love child, it's a big foot baby all covered in fur.

She's vibrator dependent.

Be different. Trust yourself. Be bold.

If you possess the basic necessities in life, there is absolutely no reason to feel any sorrows. For there is someone praying that they could have your spot.

If my decision is wrong, at least I will have learned something new. There is always next time.

On the rare occasions on which a movie was shown, there was as much suspense in the audience over whether the electricity would hold out to the end of the film as there was in the film itself.

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.

Tom Arnold and I, we have a huge firefight scene on top of a German tank. I get to shoot 50 caliber rounds. We shoot a helicopter out of the sky. That's the only fight I'm in.

Virtue knows to a farthing what it has lost by not having been vice.

The United Nations is proud to have the Adopt-A-Minefield Campaign as a partner.

If your woman picks your ducks, and she cooks and carries her Bible... now there's the complete package of womanhood.

His faithful dog salutes the smiling guest.