Dinah Shore? Wonderful woman. Dinah formed a foundation to locate missing senior citizens by putting their pictures on prune juice bottles.

There is only one goal. That's to keep working and keep flossing.

When people ask me if Dean Martin drank, let me put it this way. If Dracula bit Dean in the neck, he'd get a Bloody Mary.

Moses, who said to the children of Israel, Wear your galoshes; I never did this trick before. Never got a dinner!

Donald Trump's mother, who said, Donnie! Stop playing Monopoly and get in that barber's chair! Never got a dinner!

Amelia Earhart, who said, Stop looking for me; see if you can find my luggage! Never got a dinner!

Aladdin, who said to his wife, I know it's not a lamp, keep rubbing! Never got a dinner!

George W. Bush, who said to Pope John Paul II, Give us a visit, and bring the missus. Never got a dinner!

King Solomon, who said to his thousand wives, Who doesn't have a headache tonight? Never got a dinner!

Orville Wright said to his brother, "Wilbur, you were only in the air for 12 seconds. How could my luggage be in Cleveland?"

Jack the Ripper's mother, who said to Jack, How come I never see you with the same girl twice? Never got a dinner!

Writing is the best anti-depressant.

Loving leaders allow for individuality in style and expression.

Unlike presidential administrations, problems rarely have terminal dates.

I don't believe in God. I believe gods and devils are within us. It's our own battle. Our life's battle is to appeal to the gods within us, and to fight the devils within us.

There is still nothing in life as constant and as changing at the same time as an afternoon at a ballpark.

How much more comfortable it is to say 'Yes, and...' than 'Yes, but...'.

Let me be candid, my party is full of racists

There's not an orchestra in the world that doesn't have weaknesses. None of us can play everything well. The repertoire is just too big.

The idea of service to humanity, putting yourself in situations where people have much less than you do, puts life in perspective.

There is sometimes only a very fine line between deliberation and procrastination.