And I thought about the color and I realized what blue it was. It was the soft and changeable, essential blue of a well-worn pair of pants. Pants = Love

I love that blurry place where life’s transitions are made without you even knowing it.

You couldn't erase the past. You couldn't even change it. But sometimes life offered you the opportunity to put it right.

When you feel someone else's pain and joy as powerfully as if it were your own, then you know you really loved them.

When your about to criticize someone walk a mile in thier shoes, that way when you criticize them you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes

When she is happy, she can't stop talking, when she is sad she doesn't say a word.

Maybe the truth is, there's a little bit of loser in all of us. Being happy isn't having everything in your life be perfect. Maybe it's about stringing together all the little things.

Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not.

Your problem isn't the problem, it's your attitude about the problem.

Love is like war; easy to begin, hard to end.

The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. Got that? -Coach Brevin

When you're touring, you're constantly in motion.

Martha Stewart was convicted of four counts of lying and obstruction of justice and could serve up to 20 years in Congress.

Not gods, nor men, nor even booksellers have put up with poets' being second-rate.

I do not like being in front of the camera.

The best ambassador is a warship.

If I could say this I wouldn't have to paint.

Why not go down the pub? A guy once came up to me at a gig and asked me if I had MySpace. I said, 'This is my space, and you're invading it.'

I don't want to be a spokesman for family values, but that's the way my standup is perceived.

The areas of consensus shift unbelievably fast; the bubbles of certainty are constantly exploding.

That was the perfect penalty - apart from he missed it.