Humor Quotes
The gods had a habit of going round to atheists' houses and smashing their windows.
God seemed to have become a brand, a packaging, and people purchase this trusted brand with such faith and devotion that they no longer care who the vendor is.
Evidence is of no longer consequence when hope enters the fray, and this is where faith is born—a seemingly abundant commodity certain powerful organizations feed on fervently, if not lavishly.
All your Western theologies, the whole mythology of them, are based on the concept of God as a senile delinquent
It’s possible to be flippant here, when Jihadists fly aircraft into buildings they shout God is Great, what do atheists shout when they do it?
Never before have the tools of value creation been so great and the potential artisans so busy watching the Kardashians.
I wish you would thrash him. He deserves it."She looked back at him. "I will one day, sir. I'm getting tired of falling down.
His experience was that Justice was rarely as just as it ought to be. The others agreed.
I don't see any reason to let law interfere with justice around here. We never did before.
Absolutely. Justice served with a side of pineapple. That's what I'm here for.
She had a highly developed sense of humor which in some lights looked a bit like a sense of justice.
Kid Flash: Sorry. First time at the Hall. I'm a little overwhelmed.Robin: You're overwhelmed. Freeze was underwhelmed. Why isn't anyone just whelmed?
So, was the crime lab a reward for almost being killed?''No, it was a reward for not being Bryce,
If you tell me the truth, the truth I’ll proclaim.If you tell me a lie, you’ll be fair game.
When I came out of anesthesia, I wanted two things: my husband and my dog. They wouldn't let the dog in the recovery room.
Do you smoke, Herr Cabal?""Only to be antisocial, " replied Cabal, making no move.
If illness' end be health regained then I Will pay you, Asculapeus, when I die.
It's much more difficult to maintain personal hygiene if you're obese. Believe it or not, I've found items like remote controls and packages of cigarettes in people's fat rolls.
I used to jog but it's bad for the knees. Too much beta carotene turns you orange, too much calcium gives you kidney stones. Health kills.
When the only exorcise you get is running for a bus, get more buses!
Try jogging when following your heart, it's healthier
A tip for increased sales or in situations of life or death: Try to always refer to the lady as Miss. or Ms. Using the term: Ma'am could piss her off.
Arguing with a woman is like reading the Software License Agreement. In the end, you ignore everything and click I agree.
Or the woman in front of me in the security line who asked if they would put her cat, Dave, through the luggage X-ray machine because she wanted to see if he'd eaten a necklace.
Behind every successful man, is a Woman breathing through her mouth
Only the good die young, the bad petite-mort
Sometimes people are often confused between attitude and style. Nevermind, I'm Awesome.
Vanity might be a "sin" according to some lights, but he thought in measured doses it was one of life's allowable simple pleasures. It helped everyone get through their days.
All weather is sin-related. Lust causes thunder, anger causes fog, and you don't want to know what causes dew.
Self-pity is the hens' besetting sin, " remarked Mr. Payton. "Foolish fowl. How they came to achieve anything as perfect as the egg I do not know! I cannot fathom.
Nevertheless, it is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man.
The missing link between humans and apes? It's certainly those brutes who haven't yet learned to respect privacy.
The fact that mammalian crying serves as a cue for maternal support, rather than as a dinner bell, is a major evolutionary difference.
Alternatively, anyone who favors Intelligent Design in lieu of evolution might pause to wonder why God devoted so much of His intelligence to designing malarial parasites.
As an anonymous wit is supposed to have put it: "Hydrogen is a light, odorless gas which, given enough time, changes into people.