Humor Quotes

This book is dedicated to all of my friends who helped me get to where I am today - you know who you are... and when I find you I am going to kill you.

Well first of all, I'd just like to say that 2005 was a great year, if you like swimming through crap.

Richelle Mead delivers sexy action and tongue-in-cheek hellish humor-if damnation is this fun, sign me up!

I had no way to have a sense of humor about The Exorcist. I didn't know how. And this enabled me.

Compulsory reading for anyone who has a pig, an aunt or a sense of humor.

Sarcasm mascarades as the Preppy's sense of humor.

[Using humor to explore serious issues] disarms people. It's a way in. It's gentle, but at the same time it's subversive, and I like that duality.

His sense of humor is purely cheap vaudeville, yet everyone falls for it.

I am one of the unpraised, unrewarded millions without whom Statistics would be a bankrupt science. It is we who are born, who marry, who die, in constant ratios.

Remember that the wit, humour, and jokes of most mixed companies are local. They thrive in that particular soil, but will not often bear transplanting.

Women don't have a sense of humor. They don't need one. The Almighty made them as a permanent joke on men. From which one may logically deduce tha the Almighty is a female.

As an actor I've played a lot of gloomy, romantic leads and even though I might not want to recognize it, I actually really have a sense of humor.

Humor tells you where the trouble is.

Something that is very difficult to translate is the humor.

The first thing I look for is the humor, because you can tell what the character's fears and insecurities are through the humor.

I think as far as the action genre goes, I like when it has a sense of humor. I'm a Jane Austen/Jane Eyre kind of girl.

If I did not have a sense of humor, I would have long ago killed myself.

Humor is practically the only thing about which the English are utterly serious.

My film is very simple: An Eastern European story full of black humor about things everyone can feel and understand.

I don't think humor is forced upon my universe; it's a part of it.

I love doing meta-humor, as long as it doesn't become too distracting and it's subtle.

The next evolutionary step is into the screen.

In show business, it takes 10 years to create an overnight success. You've heard that, right? But what you don't hear is that that's the exact same amount of time it takes to create a bitter failure.

I live in Los Angeles, I know it exists. I know you're not supposed to taste air.

My dad is actually a manic depressive, which is very exciting half the time.

My good intentions are completely lethal.

In my experience, there are two things that no one will admit to: having no sense of humor and being susceptible to flattery.

Angels have a sense of humor...The angels wants us to enjoy life. Have a good laugh at yourself every now and again for taking life seriously. Then take time to laugh with the angels!

Tragedy plus time equals humor.

My memoirs are full of humor, I had to change jokes because it was a little too dark.

Americans aren't accepting of black humor, it's terrible.

But if you don't watch me, I will try and sneak in some humor. I see humor everywhere in life around me.

We made our Moriarty very different to [Conan] Doyle's. He's Irish, and he brings all his charm, his twinkle and his humor to it while he's also terrifying.

One of the first things every press secretary assures you is, the boss has a wonderful sense of humor, because not to have a sense of humor is considered flagrantly un-American.

“Secretary of State Clinton dared Iran on Monday to let her hold a town-hall meeting in Tehran.” That’s telling ’em. If the ayatollahs had a sense of humor, they’d call her bluff.

There is no humor in heaven.

Humor is man's greatest blessing.

That cat will write her autograph all over your leg if you let her.

Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog: Nobody really enjoys it, and the frog generally dies as a result.

We know, on the authority of Moses, that longer than six thousand years the world did not exist.

Demons live in many lands, but particularly in Prussia.

When I was a child there were many witches, and they bewitched both cattle and men, especially children.

The fact that the biblical book Hebrews is not an epistle of St Paul, or of any other apostle, is proved by what it says in chapter two.

God does not work salvation for fictitious sinners. Be a sinner and sin vigorously... Do not for a moment imagine that this life is the abiding place of justice; sin must be committed.

There is no rustic so rude but that, if he dreams or fancies anything, it must be the whisper of the Holy Ghost, and he himself a prophet.

How often have not the demons called 'Nix,' drawn women and girls into the water, and there had commerce with them, with fearful consequences.

We should throw the Epistle of James out of this school.

Our bodies are always exposed to Satan. The maladies I suffer are not natural, but Devil's spells.

Two devils rose from the water, and flew off through the air, crying, 'Oh, oh, oh!' and turning one over another, in sportive mockery.

Snakes and monkeys are subjected to the demon more than other animals. Satan lives in them and possesses them. He uses them to deceive men and to injure them.