Funny Quotes
I've never read a review from anybody that said, "I don't want to watch this anymore because it's just too funny. I laughed too much."
With comedy, you have to do it right. In a drama, there's a lot of different ways to succeed in a moment. But comedy comes from reality. You can't try to be funny.
The only non-believer I encountered was Oscar Levant who wouldn't visit Disneyland because he said he had his own hallucinations.
Son of Lady Chatterley's Lover had obvious commercial advantages (as a title for this book), but it impugned the marital status of my parents, something that enough critics were already doing.
It's funny because when you do become successful, you're forced to look backwards and try to crawl back into the womb where you first started to create.
Always warm up the audience with a joke....If you are not a particularly funny person, make sure that you inform them that it's a joke.
Chris Farley, I was a huge fan of his growing up. I would love to do something kind of slapstick and funny, maybe where I could change my look even a little bit.
Just for fun, I'm really goofy and I would love to do some stupid comedy. I'm talking, like, crazy, out there, Will Ferrell type of thing. I love it, I think those movies are so funny.
When somebody is doing something really funny, in real life and as a performer, my instinct is to join them.
I really like Rafer Alston. We get along great. We have a lot of fun times together that I canââ¬â¢t share with you guys.
It's very funny, American society: White culture can do all sorts of things and get away with it, but the minute a black person does it, it's interpreted in some way.
Norbit operates on the principle that vulgarity is automatically funny. Crassness doesn't need a joke attached because it is (in and of itself) the height of hilarity.
You're basically the same person forever so you find the same stuff funny forever. The Muppet Show spoke to me at 5 and it speaks to me in my late 30s in the same way.
The promos with all of the beautiful women probably attracted some men, but the mystery story line is pretty cool. It's got that dark edge, and people will watch anything funny.
True charity ought to begin in marriage, for it is a relationship that must be rebuilt every day.
I believe our differences are the little pinches of salt that can make the marriage seem more flavorful.
This was the way the night had cashed in. Choices had been made and things happened, and here we were. It was sad, and funny. My life was made of this. Stuff like this.
My choices were to either give in and let them kill all of us or fight back with everything I had. I chose the second one, ’cause I’m just funny that way.
A friendship counting nearly forty years is the finest kind of shade-tree I know.
In black comedic culture, there's always been a thing about "Man, I ain't gotta wear a dress to be funny!" But I've done it.
I really wanted to just be a musician. I didn't want to be anything else, but I was funny and all that.
You may be old, you may be in your third act, but you can still be vital and sexual and funny. Life isn't over.
It's hard to learn about comedy from comedians. Comedy is not something that you necessarily learn or can imitate. You're funny or you're not, and you hope what you're doing is funny.
To open the majority of peoples' minds to something new is difficult. I always think that, as long as it's funny underneath, then you can argue that a teaspoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.
I always found it really funny when actors would come offstage, smoking cigarettes and swearing at each other.
British humour is very cruel. It's my favourite kind of humour; if it isn't cruel and funny it doesn't really cut the cake for me.
No guy in the history of America has ordered a Smirnoff Ice at a bar without hating himself a little.
I always dressed funny or weird, if you want to call it that. It was always part of who I am and I dressed in my freakish way a long time before we ever thought about founding Orgy.
A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog's IQ. Here's how it works: if you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
The Supreme Court has ruled that anybody can be strip-searched for any kind of arrest. That's something to think about the next time you bring 12 items into a 10-item-or-less lane.
A new poll shows that Americans now believe that Bill Clinton is more honest than President Bush. At least when Clinton screwed the nation, he did it one person at a time.
How would it be if we discovered that aliens only stopped by earth to let their kids take a leak?
Usain Bolt won the gold for the men's 100- and 200-meter dashes for the second Olympics in a row. You know, he has been running since he was in elementary school - kind of like Mitt Romney.
You Cannot Live as I Have Lived and Not End Up Like This: The Thoroughly Disgraceful Life & Times of Willie Donaldson.
Most of the stories I have go downhill quickly. In all honesty most of the good stories I have, no one else would think is funny.
The only food he has ever stolen has been down on a coffee table. He claims that he genuinely believed it to be a table meant for dogs.
I’m in, Cat. I’d never leave you. Especially when you’ve got death breathing down your neck.” “Very funny,” I retorted, since Bones was inches from my throat
If you're playing things sincere in a really absurd, heightened situation, you'll achieve comedy as opposed to just saying funny lines and one-liners and stuff.
It's funny. You succeed, but now where are you gonna go from there? I've got to keep proving that I can laugh or cry more real each time.