Your tears only water your weeds

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.

There is only one goal. That's to keep working and keep flossing.

I’ve done made a deal with the devil.

Mutually assured destruction.

Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations.

When people ask me if Dean Martin drank, let me put it this way. If Dracula bit Dean in the neck, he'd get a Bloody Mary.

If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur.

The most important thing in coaching is communication. It's not what you say as much as what they absorb.

Tell me then, does love make one a fool or do only fools fall in love?

True love for our nation will compel us to shout on the streets and get on our knees and ask people to repent

Because…sometimes I think you meet people and they make you better, even if you’re not with them forever.

Might and wrong combined, like iron magnetized, are endowed with irresistible attraction.

Painting is a lot harder than pickin' cotton. Cotton's right there for you to pull off the stalk, but to paint, you got to sweat your mind.

Oh, I've seen copies [of Linux Journal] around the terminal room at The Labs.

There's nothing more precious in this world than the feeling of being wanted.

Academic writing you have to get right. Fiction you have to get plausible. And there's a world of difference.

Wasn't it thrilling when the U.S. Women's team took home the gold in gymnastics? A group of American teenagers getting a higher score than Chinese kids? That never happens.

Good music can act as a guide to good living.

I am so sick of reading about another car bomb, another suicide bomber, another 10, 20, 30, 70, 100 people dead in a day, both Americans and Iraqis.