You can't fool the American people - politician trying to fool the American people.

If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.

Life is what you make of it, unless you have tourette's, in which case much becomes involuntary.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Cupcakes are the tattooed brunette chick of the baked goods world.

Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

Happiness is a carnival game. It's never as easy as it looks, but the dumb ones always seem to be walking around with a big stuffed animal.

It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.

Poetry is an art of expressing the unknown music of our inner feelings and emotions in our known language.

Do not make children cross-eyed, by having hair hang about their foreheads, where they see it continually.

What is inner peace but a deeply held belief that your current situation is exactly as it should be." - L. R. W. Lee, Andy Smithson: Blast of the Dragon's Fury

Christmas, my child, is love in action.

Having the choice at the end of my life has become incredibly important. It has given me a sense of peace during a time that otherwise would be dominated by fear, uncertainty and pain.

There is a slumbering subterranean fire in nature which never goes out, and which no cold can chill.

Nothing enduring can be built on violence.

Here I am, a Palestinian Arab who only knows how to write in Hebrew, stuck in central Illinois.

If Bush, as I believe, has reliable information on the fact that Saddam Hussein is making weapons of mass destruction, I cannot not support the policies of his government.

Malice often takes the garb of truth.