What to do with your one life? The same thing you would do if you had two lives, and this were the second.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie.

You can spend too much time wondering which of identical twins is the more alike.

What greater blessing to give thanks for at a family gathering than the family and the gathering.

Ever wonder what crime you committed that you are confined to a small enclosure above your sinuses, under permanent skull arrest?

If minutes were kept of a family gathering, they would show that "Members not Present" and "Subjects Discussed" were one and the same.

It finally happened. I got the GPS lady so confused, she said, "In one-quarter mile, make a legal stop and ask directions.

For the most part, we carnivores do not eat other carnivores. We prefer to eat our vegetarian friends.

On a windswept hill by a billowing sea, my destiny sits and waits for me.

It is not that love is blind. It is that love sees with a painter's eye, finding the essence that renders all else background.

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so?There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.

Real optimism is not the pep talk you give yourself. It is earned through the labor involved in emotional housekeeping.

The urge to lie is produced by the contradictions in our lives. We are made to declare love for our country, while it tramples our rights and dignity.

Offend her, and she knows not to forgive; Oblige her, and she'll hate you while you live.

Albert King wasn't my brother in blood, but he sure was my brother in Blues

My early work and publications centered around expanding on the analysis of life insurance in my dissertation and its relationship to investment banking.

There is no success without a successor.

... we must drive them [Jews] out like mad dogs, so that we do not become partakers of their abominable blasphemy and all the their other vices and thus merit God's wrath and be damned with them.

An education reformer is as important in America as the first lady.

I will embrace today's difficult tasks, take off my coat, and make dust in the world.