What's your name?" "Becky Thatcher. What's yours? Oh, I know. It's Thomas Sawyer." "That's the name they lick me by. I'm Tom when I'm good. You call me Tom, will you?" "Yes

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

Stop telling God what to do with his dice.

Good luck with the aliens, and if we survive this feel free to look me up on your next vacation.”“Good luck with the aliens? You are such a prick.

He looked exactly the same when he was alive, only he was vertical.

The visibility at the best of times is liable to be a bit haxy due to clouds of ignorance.

I consider myself a human being, a Christian, a father, a husband, so many things, before being a black person.

Skillfully engaging in intimate relationships can be one of the most potent spiritual practices.

He had supposed for years that he had no secrets from himself. Here was proof that he had a great big secret somewhere inside, and he could not imagine what it was.

So that Sunday morning I ended up going to church and that’s when I got saved.

Whatever age you think I am, you’re probably right.