We are a nation of children letting horrible things happen, and flunking Calc.

Anyone who gives you a cinnamon roll fresh out of the oven is a friend for life.

Miracles are like meatballs, because nobody can exactly agree on what they are made of, where they come from, or how often they should appear.

Temper tantrums, however fun they may be to throw, rarely solve whatever problem is causing them.

I didn't realize this was a sad occasion.

They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.

Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby - awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.

Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.

The thing with your heart's desire is that your heart doesn't even know what it desires until it turns up.

Accidents happen all the time.

Morning is an important time of day, because how you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have.

In order to discover who you are within, you need to attune your visionary world deep in your sub-conscience to the outward world and live it.

If you brave in life, you get the best of life.

Enjoy the present hour Be thankful for the past And neither fear nor wish Th' approaches of the last.

In America, if a Democrat even thinks you're calling him liberal he grabs an orange vest and a rifle and heads into the woods to kill something.

I wouldn't say I was a rebel as such, but I certainly wasn't right at school.

Stop it. Do not feel safe with him. The Stockholm Syndrome is not your friend.

I'm not the kind of guy who likes to rush things through. I like to take my time and finish when I'm finished.

The following year, after I had prepared my draft, the Conference of the Interparliamentary Union at The Hague decided to set up a special commission to study the problem seriously.

When you're talking to the media, be a well, not a fountain.

There are so many things about which some old man ought to tell one while one is little; for when one is grown one would know them as a matter of course.