The best definition of an immortal is someone who hasn't died yet.

American-style iced tea is the perfect drink for a hot, sunny day. It's never really caught on in the UK, probably because the last time we had a hot, sunny day was back in 1957.

Lawyers are predators in grey worsted

New technology is useful, but it's inefficient and ugly; it knows it'll be obsolete by lunchtime tomorrow, so it has no incentive to be anything else

In spite of really intense competition for the job, I'm still my own worst enemy.

It was irritating to have one's physical shortcomings pointed out quite so plainly twice in one evening, once by a beautiful girl and once by a dying badger.

After all, what else is scientific enquiry of any sort other than a controlled version of banging one's head against the universe until something gives?

Human beings can get used to virtually anything, given plenty of time and no choice in the matter whatsoever.

There’s nothing bad about reincarnation per se, it’s basically a very good system, cost-effective and ecologically friendly.

Telling lies is a bit like tiling bathrooms - if you don't know how to do it properly, it's best not to try.

Love is an optical illusion that makes you believe the object of your affection is the most beautiful person in the world.

Nothing but education defines the future of a person and the future of a nation.

Storms pass by on their way to get all the colors needed to paint your rainbow.

If I want to 'f' a guy, I want to 'f' a guy.

You know where we got stuck? We were looking for faithfull, loving and perfect relationships-males who were always glad to see us." "So?" "We already have that!" "What do you mean?" "We've got dogs!

I wish we had more [Dwight] Eisenhower Republicans in this [Donald]Trump cabinet.

The Americans are very clear, and obsessed with nouns.

Sometimes a broken dream will make you sad or make you mean. Sometimes things ain't bad as they seem.

Fight back! Whenever you are offered violence, fight back! The aggressor does not fear the law, so he must be taught to fear you. Whatever the risk, and at whatever the cost, fight back!

When my wife died, I booked myself into the studio just to work, to occupy myself.

In the coming year, I believe we can make sure America lives up to its legacy as a land of opportunity if the President is willing to back up his rhetoric with substance.