That part of his body was simply uncontrollable, apparently functioning in accordance to a single law of nature: She existed--he got a hard-on.

Valhalla on the right. Paradise regained on the left. Stuck between a Godiva truffle and a chocolate eclair. Between a rock and a very hard place. Two very hard places from the looks of it.

I'm sorry your pretty little world got all screwed up, but everybody's does, and you go on. It's how you go on that defines you.

Oh, drop the act, Tinkerbell, and get rid of my problem. Then we’ll talk.

There should be a vaccine against Adam Black. And all women should be given it at birth.

Some people bring out the worst in you, others bring out the best, and then there are those remarkably rare, addictive ones who just bring out the most. Of everything.

Life's a choice: you can live in black and white, or you can live in colour. I'll take every shade of the rainbow and the gazillion in between!

It's often only in the lies we refuse to speak that any truth can be heard at all.

Nobody looks good in their darkest hours. But it's those hours that make us what we are.

The most confused we ever get is when we're trying to convince our heads of something our heart knows is a lie.

Fire to my ice. Ice to my fever.

You can't change your life. What you can change is YOUR APPROACH.

If something is built to show, it's build to grow.

Almsgiving leaves a man just where he was before. Aid restores him to society as an individual worthy of all respect and not as a man with a grievance.

When you relinquish the desire to control your future, you can have more happiness.

I have found that I always learn more from my mistakes than from my successes. If you aren't making some mistakes, you aren't taking enough chances.

That little white ball won't move until you hit it, and there's nothing you can do after it has gone.

I hesitated for all the right reasons. And I accepted for all the wrong ones.

1. Be on time. 2. Never criticize a teammate. 3. Never use profanity.

Lust is the cause of generation.

Shania Twain ... has done more for country and western than heartbreak and whiskey combined.