Smartphones. Who cares? Smartphones. I only have dummy phones.

Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera.

No matter where you go in this world, you will always find a Jew sitting in the beach chair next to you.

I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He'd just pick up the couch and walk out of the room.

When you enter a room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket.

When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last.

Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?

I always rib people, but nobody ever gives me a hard time. I don't know why. Maybe they're afraid of what I might say. There's probably a lesson in that somewhere, but I don't know what it is.

Yeah, I make fun of blacks, and why not? I'm not a black.

I used to play golf. I wanted to be a better player, but after a while I realized I'd always stink. And that's when I really started to enjoy the game.

Some people say funny things - but I say things funny.

It can be accepted that there is a price for man's work, time spent or service done, but never for human dignity.

Anybody body can be a Church goer, but there is a difference of "GOD" being in them then they being in the WORLD.

These memories are part of my heritage, the fabric of my personality, and as real to me as the land itself.

The lower your expectation the easier and happier your life will be

A man after his own heart.

I don't need you to remind me of my age. I have a bladder to do that for me.

Marriage is about love, but it is not first and foremost about love. First and foremost, marriage is about continuity and transmission.

Life is a difficult game. You can win it only by retaining your birthright to be a person.

I guess I've always liked the idea of being an artist.

If Java had true garbage collection, most programs would delete themselves upon execution.