Sanguillen is totally unpredictable to pitch to because he's so unpredictable.

The new Haitian baseball can't weigh more than four ounces or less than five.

Winfield goes back to the wall. He hits his head on the wall and it rolls off! It's rolling all the way back to second base! This is a terrible thing for the Padres!

Sometimes big trees grow out of acorns - I think I heard that from a squirrel.

Hats off to drug abusers everywhere.

Those amateur umpires are certainly flexing their fangs tonight.

He slides into second with a stand-up double.

And Kansas City is at Chicago tonight, or is it Chicago at Kansas City? Well, no matter as Kansas City leads in the eighth 4 to 4.

Hector Torrez, how can you communicate with Enzo Hernandez when he speaks Spanish and you speak Mexican?

There is someone warming up in the Giants' bullpen, but he's obscured by his number.

Ozzie Smith just made another play that I've never seen anyone else make before, and I've seen him make it more often than anyone else ever has.

To live is to walk beside Death but never join hands. ~ Captain Buck "Slackeye" Roberts

Do not bury our glorious orthodoxy in the treacherous pit of a spurious conservatism.

People always tend to chose what is best for them. They pretend to be unselfish, all so that they can feel good about themselves. Even that really is a selfish decision.

Know, thou, that the lines that live are turned out of a furrowed brow.

The constructive intellect [genius] produces thoughts, sentences, poems, plans, designs, systems. It is the generation of the mind, the marriage of thought with nature.

What is required is sight and insight- then you might add one more: excite.

They [men and women] have both been, and men especially, have been told that how they naturally are is bad.

Nothing is so contemptible as the sentiments of the mob.

A portrait, to be a work of art, neither must nor may resemble the sitter... one must paint its atmosphere.

I am enormously wise and abysmally ignorant.