Life is just so much fun and so filled with humor.

A conservative, a liberal, and a moderate walk into a bar. The bartender says, 'Hi, Mitt.'

You know, back in my days they used Bayer aspirin for contraception. The gals put it between their knees and it wasn't that costly.

Success should stem from entrepreneurial creativity, not political connectivity.

The United Nations Childrens Fund reports that more than 18 million children worldwide have lost both parents to the ravages of AIDS, starvation, war or natural disasters.

Wealth is the ultimate panacea to poverty.

Amazons Jeff Bezos, Facebooks Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, and Steve Jobs did not start out wealthy, and actually added to income inequality, but we all benefit from their creative effort.

I want to make sure the people we elect to office believe in America.

I have four kids. They are two years apart, and contraception has been very, very good to me.

It's so sad to see how few people in the Obama administration have any private sector experience.

The Biblical language was so deeply embedded in the great man's mind that it became his normal way of speaking.

Life will never be perfect, so we must learn how to make the imperfections work for us.

Denial has rented a room in my head and frequently stomps around slamming doors.

A man is never so proud as when striking an attitude of humility.

The marathon never ceases to be a race of joy, a race of wonder.

Far more than any other power, imagination is what sets human beings apart from every other species on earth.

I never have a bad night, bad day, bad moment.

I've always had a sense of humour, and I still do, so I just want to go on performing as long as I can. It's as simple as that.

My curse on plays That have to be set up in fifty ways, On the day's war with every knave and dolt, Theater business, management of men.